yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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