youre lurking in front of me
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize