Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
