she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
