Banned from zoo.
Again?
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
there is glitter all over my balls
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