Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
