guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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