the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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