Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
