Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Randomize