Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
this will be a night to untag.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
