We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
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