we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
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