I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
