butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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