We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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