the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
