I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
All the doctor said was why
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
