Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
