we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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