Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
