making cat noises will not fix the situation.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
