How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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