If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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