Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I smell like Dick and happiness
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