Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
