Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
