omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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