he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
