You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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