Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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