Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
