cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I need to calm my uterus...
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
