I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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