I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i jhust puked up my retainher.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
