it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
ttyl tear gas
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
