Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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