love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
