So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Randomize