yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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