Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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