I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
