If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I could make wine with my vomit
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
