Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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