Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
