There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
