Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
