it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
