If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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