If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
