How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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